Feeling like a failure?

Contrary to popular belief, failing once or twice doesn’t make you a failure.

Call it a rite of passage, but most, if not all of us have been there. You look at where you are and are not satisfied with what you see. You feel frustrated and disappointed in yourself because of what you haven’t achieved so far. Some common footpaths that lead us to this feeling include:

• Unsatisfactory achievements. We all grow up with dreams, and as we grow up, we keep modifying them. One thing remains constant through all these, we look to the future and dream of accomplishing something. When you look back and discover that you are yet to accomplish even a fraction of all you had dreamt of, disappointment and the feeling of failure creeps in.
• Stuck in a rut. Remember in the beginning when you thought to yourself, ‘I’m going to do this for a few weeks till I get my affairs in order, till I get my big break, till, I’m out of debt?’ Only to wake up several years later to realize your short term plan has taken longer than you expected, and you cannot find your way out.
• Comparing yourself to others. This is the worst trigger yet. Even though we have been advised over and over not to compare our lives to others, we find ourselves doing that, especially on social media. Don’t you realize that you cannot compare 100% of your life with the 5% someone else deems good enough to share with you? Look at it this way, we are always very enthusiastic to share whatever good thing that happens to us, to everyone who can listen. Do we do the same thing for our failures? Do we share our bad days with everyone? Or do we only share this with our closest confidants, or no one at all?

Although this feeling befalls most of us at one point in life, what differentiates us is what we do about it. Why not consider this:-

1. Wake up call. By feeling like a failure at the moment, it means that even you realize that you have more to offer than what you currently are. Just like an alarm clock rises you from slumber, why not use this opportunity to jolt yourself awake, expand your horizon and do more than what you are doing at the moment?
2. Be accountable. This is the time to own up to your mistakes. What were your dreams? What had you hoped to accomplish by now? Why haven’t you done so? Be frank with yourself and own up to what you did wrong, or didn’t do; that stopped you from achieving what you had dreamed of. This step is important in your process because this is how you learn from your mistakes. When you identify the whys, you can avoid making the same errors.
3. Take stock of yourself. Now that you have been roused from your comfort zone, find out what you can do to expand your horizons. If the dream is not feasible any more, can you dream afresh? Make a table, list your interests, strengths and talents and figure out how to better exploit them. It could involve volunteer ship, or even creating a new business. Don’t just acknowledge what you are good at, go a step further and figure out how you can use your gift to bless others and hopefully,  improve your financial portfolio in the process.
4. Act now. Don’t let the inspiration to do and be better just be that, an inspiration, step out and act on it.

James 2:18 NIV

But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.” Show me your faith without deeds and I will show you my faith by my deeds.”

It is not enough to have faith that everything will get better, that you will accomplish what you have always dreamed of, that you are good at something. Back it up with actions, that’s how to realize your potential. Only through action will you say, ‘Thank God for that moment I felt like a failure, because it pushed me to realize my dream.’

Many have been at this point in life. Call it a fork road, because the choice you make will define your tomorrow.